I Wish I'd Met Christ Before I Met Christians: Part 1

Why Is It So Hard to Get Along in The Church?

     Shame on whoever hurt this poor little boy!! L.O.L.

     Family, I know we're not supposed to publicly talk about how difficult  tough  frustrating annoying  downright hellish ministry feels sometimes, but er- uh- I'm going there. Brace yourselves...

     First of all, I say this  with love. Really. I say this, as a person who is committed to being the change I want to see within the body of Christ as well as working toward the goals and objectives that God has set for us. I think that if I didn't say anything, knowing that something needed to be said, I'd be doing a disservice, being disobedient, and ignoring problems which is being a part of the problem.

     I was talking to a sister just the other day about how some people sometimes seem to thrive in messiness and chaos and how much it bothers me. Now, I've never been one of those people who could easily put out of my mind other people's conditions and issues and I'm working on not dwelling on it. But the reason I have an issue with that is because I want people to be better. I see people seemingly forget how to love one another and it hurts me a little every time, knowing that this wasn't God's intention for His Church. It hurts and it makes me wonder how God feels, seeing us gossip; back bite; ignore; hate; slander, refuse instruction/unity, among many other things.

     We know that there will always be disagreement as long as more than one person is working toward a common goal. Why? Because, quite frankly, the common goal is never enough to unite the people. It takes much more than that. It takes a daily renewing of our willingness to unite and a constant refusal to focus on trivial/shallow things.

     I've heard a pastor say that going to church shouldn't feel like going to the dentist. No offense, dentists and/or dental hygienists. But have you ever gone to church or more specifically, been a contributing member of a church where you felt annoyance every time you thought about going? Now, I say 'contributing member' not just talking about tithing with money. I'm talking about working within the ministry: music, office staff, custodian, nurse/usher, ministerial staff, etc. See what I mean? We get to a point, sadly, where we get tired of the work, but not for nothing. The work changes the more involved you get.

     I grew up going to a church that I just adore. I mean, to this day, that church is still amazing to me. I remember being so encouraged in hard times by our pastor and fellow members. I remember being motivated to do better. But I was never heavily involved in the behind-the-scenes parts of the church. In hindsight, I think that's probably why I always saw it as such a cool, mellow, and easy-going place. I had no reason to think otherwise because I never got in deep enough to really work with people toward a common goal or project, where we'd inevitably disagree on something.

     The problem isn't the disagreement, guys. It's the fact that we have such a problem compromising and working together toward bigger (higher, nobler) goals. We seem to hate resolution, but instead love having something or somebody messy to talk about with someone else. What's the deal? Where does this come from? How do we fix it?

     The root of the problem is our relationship with Christ. Do you have one or not? Ask yourself. Are you close? A good way to know if you really have a close relationship with God is that you know when he's speaking to you versus when you're speaking to yourself. When you're seeking God, pursuing him with all your heart, you know his voice. That's not to say his physically perceptible voice, by the way. I'm talking about God communicating with you in prayer, the Holy Spirit ministering to you in your bible study and meditation time, or when it seems angels are protecting/keeping you from harm versus when someone else does it, (though the two aren't necessarily mutually exclusive).

     Asking yourself the question, 'how's my relationship with Christ?' is important because if you're close with God, you become more and more like him. Check this list and answer honestly

1. I pursue and bring peace. 
2. I genuinely care about the people around you. 
3. I don't put yourself away from and above people in your mind, instead looking for solutions when possible. 
4. I love people with your actions. 
5. I'm generous, sweet, and people generally find it easy to work with me. 
6. My peers come to me for advice. 
7. My peers are also uncomfortable bringing their ungodly things, ways, and language around me. 
8. I'm easily recognizable as a person of God. 

      Family, ask yourself a couple questions this week and answer honestly because it's in our nature to assume that the problem lies with someone else. But not only is introspection a huge part of our walk with Christ, it might make you reevaluate your high esteem of yourself. It's absolutely necessary that we examine ourselves before we try to suggest the problem must be with someone else. Sure, you've gotten along okay all this time, but God could be trying to reach/teach YOU for even better now. 

Am I contributing to chaos/negativity within my church (actively or passively)?

How's my relationship with God?

Matthew 7:3 "Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?"

This post was assisted by my Pastor, Vic Speakman, of Bethel OFWB Church.